THE SECRET TO A PERFECT D-M OMELETTE IS… TREAT THE DARK MATTER JUST LIKE A GHERKIN!!!

Okay let me try making more sense so that your undeveloped, out dated, puny, incapable little brains have a chance to attempt to have an opportunity to try to attempt to understand this complex procedure. BEWARE. IF YOU FAIL, YOU ARE A MAJOR BOOM BOOM…..

Step 1: keep it in a jar of water in a box of radiation infused lithium ion batteries.(i told you, just like gherkins!)

Step 2: take it out immediately. what are you? nuts? everyone knows dark matter has to be kept in jar of oil in a  box of radiation infused lithium ion batteries.

AND THAT IS IT! JUST LIKE GHERKINS. NOW ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS FRY IT AND TRADE IT TO A SPACE TERRORIST OCTOPUS IN EXCHANGE FOR A DARK MATTER OMELETTE!

(do not worry they swear only to use it on other galaxies- galaxies that will not exist any longer…)